Northern Michigan – There are more questions than answers in this post, but in the spirit of togetherness through shared experience, I’m hoping it will still be helpful.

I write often about how difficult I find relaxation, and although I’m getting way better at prioritizing the enjoyable, restful, and (seemingly) purposeless experiences in life, the larger hunt for direction and meaning still hovers day-to-day.

I’ve been in a season of professional excitement and personal happiness. Since I know these seasons ebb and flow, I’m taking the extra time to enjoy it while it lasts. Recently I spent some quiet time with close people in southern California, then a week in a remote cabin in northern Michigan for some creative solitude before tallying up more cross-country flights and fun tours. I can see clearly how coveted this life could be, and despite the inevitable stress that comes from a life of full-time travel, I live each day in immense gratitude and with my eyes wide open to how lucky I am. That said, emotional turmoil still simmers behind the scenes many days, and it would be a disservice to us all to pretend like everything is rainbows all the time.

I’ve been diving deeper into my own perfectionism and reliance on productivity, and I’m finding the constant desire for forward motion and wanting “more” is making my life more challenging than usual. 

I strongly believe that “life is a journey not a destination” and in all those meme-worthy mantras, but this doesn’t give me much day-to-day guidance. Where do worthwhile hustle and healthy productivity fit in the mix? When do we push, and when do we sit back?  Surely our destinies are not written so entirely that we should just be along for the ride. Where do ambition, activism, and goal-setting fit? 

In our industry we would sit stagnant if we spent our days relaxing and worrying only about “the now”. So when do we push, and when do we sit back and enjoy? Our society rewards success, and also likes to throw memes around about living fully present. Surely there’s a balance…

One of the strategies I’ve used lately is to regularly ask myself “what is it I’m striving for, and how much of that eventual ‘destination’ is happening now?” 

I’m currently enjoying living in happiness, companionship, wonderful friendships, changing students’ lives, travel, etc., and if I were to describe my destination dream life once I’ve found “true success”, it would be dependent on having all of those things. This thought process encourages me to stay aware of how I’m defining success, and recognize it as it shows up.

That said, many of my larger dreams look outward beyond self-focused goals to serve others in a way I haven’t quite figured out yet.  So I keep working, but never quite sure how I should be making decisions day-to-day. When I’m enjoying the present I’m often feeling anxious about the future, and when I’m working hard I worry that the present is passing by unappreciated. Is this a common occurrence for industry creatives? 

A dear friend suggested I decide my true principles and the foundation of my larger dreams, and make sure I live and act in line with them every day. This would guarantee I stay oriented in the direction of my values and dreams even when I’m not pressing the gas pedal. For me those fundamentals are meaningful connectedness, helping others, healing through creativity … and with that in mind, my short-term goals are to intentionally live in that spirit every day. Even if it’s just sending a few out-of-the-blue texts, asking the cashier about his day, or a long walk in the woods.

She also said “every moment spent worrying about the future is a moment you’re preventing it from happening”, but that one is taking a little longer to digest. 🙂

Hope a piece of this helps you feel comforted or understood. Please forward on to anyone who could use it.

Much love, drifters ❤️
Diana