I crash-landed onto my bandmate’s couch after an exhausting but rewarding day of teaching. I had finally stopped, but my brain continued its inner debate about whether a last-minute trip to California simply to “relax” was a good idea. It seemed so silly, yet I found my “reckless brain” fighting hard to convince my “rational brain” to book the flight. I was torn. A series of events had brought the idea for this short visit to the surface, and my curiosity to re-experience this particular city wasn’t letting go. It was a warm Michigan evening and still light out at 9pm, so I set out for a walk and called my Mom to ask her opinion on this crazy LA idea. We talked for an hour about life, relationships, current health issues, and laughed about drama and those who feed on it.

I hung up the phone smiling and was struck with a moment of extreme clarity. It dawned on me that every one of the factors that made my day so satisfying and enjoyable won’t always be there. I was face-to-face with the sobering impermanence of so many things in my life. For an instant, I fast-forwarded ahead 5 years and could look back with keen hindsight at all that I have and shouldn’t take for granted.

It was a powerful moment and I was so relieved to have awoken to it before it was too late to properly appreciate all of the amazing life ingredients that went flying through my head. To name just a few:

• Happy, progressing bands that I love sharing the stage with.
• A co-worker that I laugh with all day and get to call my best friend.
• Stamina to teach 7 hours, then perform a show.
• A day full of beautiful, colorful young faces smiling back at me.
• Leg/knee strength to walk for an hour after a full day teaching.
• The ability to call my Mom for advice, and opportunity to plan my Dad’s Father’s Day present.
• Freedom to fly to LA with no one depending on me, and the financial means to do it.

Impermanence can be troublesome and terrifying, and the cure I’ve found for this worry is presence and gratitude. Full awareness of the moment, and immense respect for its inevitable end. Then when change arises and something ends, I can move forward peacefully with no regrets, knowing that I appreciated it fully. Needless to say, I booked the flight that evening and landed in LA 3 days later. More on that next.

Stay present, drriifters 💙🌏💨

Diana